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An online sequencer with a selection of instruments and meme sounds.
  1. Restrictions on submit
  2. How to use
  3. Downloads and Mirrors
  4. See Also
DON'T YOU LECTURE ME WITH YOUR THIRTY DOLLAR WEBSITE, or 🗿, is an online sequencer with a selection of instruments and meme sounds. It was created by @TheRealGDColon
, announced via this tweet on Jan 26, 2022
, and is available at (There are a bunch of example tracks on that Twitter thread.)

Think of this format as meme Mario Paint Plus, but with a surprising amount of versatility... oh, and all the notes.

Restrictions on submit

Your submitted file should be the .🗿 file that can be loaded on the page. Note that there is currently no wav/mp3 export, so you will need to playback and record the audio yourself for renders.

How to use

Most of the basic functions of the sequencer (add, delete, pitch change, duplicate, and drag around) are indicated on the tool itself, as well as the available commands you can implement, but for convenience some of the more important functions will be listed here.

* Combine↔️: You're probably going to want multiple sounds to occur at the same time. This is how you do that. You will learn to love it, because it's ALL YOU HAVE! You can keep chaining sounds but the more you do it, the laggier your browser will likely get. Huh, is this format PC performance based? :thinking:
* Set Tempo⏩: Sets a "sounds per minute" value, can go as high as 10,000. This means that a "beat" is equivalent to one sound/sample icon.
* Pause⏸️: Set a number of beats for the sequencer to pause before it proceeds to the next command. You can also use • (the very first option in the samples list) to pause for one beat.
* Loops🔁 & Targets⏺️: You can specify loop points as well as indicate how many loops should occur before proceeding. Multiple loop points can exist, it will always seek out the most recent point. Targets work similarly as "go to" points: set a Target, and later on, set a "Go to Target" command to go to the chosen Target. You can have multiple Targets, identified by number.
* Set Volume🔊: Sets the global volume of all sounds to be played after it. Note that even if you use it in part of a combined sound, the resulting combined sound will all have the chosen volume. Can climb to 200% but it's already easy to clip with this thing.
* Stop ALL Sounds❎: Does what it says on the tin. All sounds will fade (i.e. the whole sample will play every time) unless this command is used.

The most fun part of this format, though, is that it is secretly an MML gateway drug: the exported .🗿 file is in plaintext and therefore easy to modify. Due to the lack of a select-multiple-objects function OR copy/paste function OR undo function, modifying a .🗿 file in a text editor is the recommended way to copy/paste large chunks of sequencer data quickly. Many of the sounds are also represented with emoji, but you could pretty easily get the hang of straight-up MML sequencing this format. Cool meme format huh?

Downloads and Mirrors

Different versions of this tool can be downloaded here
. There are currently two archived versions. The original one from January 2022, and an updated version from May 2022. Userscript-Rewrites for smoother playback are archived there too.

In case the original page dies, working mirrors can be found here:
Version 1:
Version 2:
(pls tell kleeder if this one stops working, thx)
These versions have the userscript added, so you don't have to deal with plugins.

See Also

Mario Paint
Know Your Meme article
for more info

Battle Formats