Spring, I have not yet to submit the chip battleart and the 64k module, because i've a busy a lot for plannings to do. So, I decided to filming my music video myself, before I do the chip battleart by making an ascii art with using MS Paint, including the 64K Module made with Milkytracker that I collaborated with..
why you didn't get gold chip battle art yet is beyond me. it's good that you're not giving up anyway, do as you feel about submitting to battles, i hope you'll keep submitting artz at least 'cause i just changed my avatar because of you! and most importantly it contributes to the friendliness of this place!
well, we'll see, and to be honest I kinda always feel bad no matter where I place, it's just the feeling of being judged but whatever...
not sure how it contributes to any friendlyness but thank you I guess <3
well i can only speak for myself but to me your cover arts with botbrs make this place warmer and contribute to the overall pleasure i get from being part of botb. i can't really relate to what you feel about being judged as i don't take the votings (or judgements) very seriously, i don't see what's painful about being judged, to me it's just an opportunity to get useful criticism (which votings aren't for the reasons you mentioned in the bulletin)
dont even start this passive-aggressive bullshit here.
you, same as everyone else, is an important part of this community and its cool to have you around.
we can give you tips on how to improve, we can give you feedback on entries etc.
we can also help you with problems if they occur, but its preferred to do this in a chat or maybe even in a private chat rather than putting it on the front page. dont you think other people dont struggle with their creative work and feel bad about it sometimes? is everyone creating threads about it now, saying they suck and their work is terrible? ohh.. no they dont.
this self pity stuff isnt what we need or want here on the front page, its stuff you can communicate with a friend maybe, or in a smaller group chat. this place is about music(art) competitions and not about giving you psychological help for your self-confidence.
post #126129 ::
2020.08.28 12:16pm :: edit 2020.08.28 12:26pm Spring liēkd this
Awiffle! Hello, and good afternoon, everybody. Let's express your personal views about yourselves privately, if must be: A public profile never is a polite place to confront anyone.
This is a friendly community, and unique enough for members of to feel as familiars: Battle of the Bits isn't all about competitions, but friendship.
I love you being here, Spring, and want you to feel good, and supported, by involving yourself herein. You are set to thrive on everything you do, and am looking forward to also witness you do, forever ahead!
hey, interjecting for a hot second: kleeder has a great point here. outright creating threads for opinions and advice on your work isn't the problem here, it's more your attitude on those threads. your outright pessimistic attitude about your work ambiguifies your true intent behind said articles, and your passive-aggressive comments about kleed are downright rude and uncalled for.
lemme respond to oli too while i'm here...
"Let's express your personal views about yourselves privately, if must be: A public profile never is a polite place to confront anyone."
kleed told me that he told spring not to take stuff to public, yet they have. he has a right to do so despite him not wanting to, as he has also told me. i do agree with you that a profile isn't the best place to take things, but if the person you're debating has already taken things public then you're completely free to take things to the front door in my opinion.
spring. i get that you're probably going through some rough times -- believe me, most of the world is atp -- and from what i've seen so far, i'm seeing a ton of emotions i've seen in friends before. friends who have gone through emotional turmoil and trauma, who have honestly been suffering a ton even before i met them. that's why i can say with clear confidence that this is not the way: i've been through too many near-cutoffs of friends due to similar attitudes they've exhibited before, and every time they've suffered a great loss of respect from or outright alienating their other friends because of it. i'd highly suggest venting to other friends instead of taking things public or fullstop getting a therapist and having sessions, as you'd get much more out of a private vent than a public rant.
please. i'd rather you not take this destructive path. you're an important part of this community and we all care for you greatly.
Well, you are right, it's also purely because of health issues that I suddenly start to show aggression. Which is really kind of uncalled for and not intended.
I did go too far now but I'm not really sure where to go from here, as far as using botb is concerned. . . it sounds really stupid and I know it is stupid but I simply can't stop tying numbers and points and results to personal worth, it's the ramblings of a sick mind and it doesn't really go away no matter what I do . . .
Does that mean that its a public concern instead of a strictly personal problem though? Not really, I realize that and its not really right to make it one, but don't expect me to be able to just think differently, I just can't at the moment and if I could I would certainly have done it. I can see how that arguably means I really shouldn't have ever posted any entries and I regret doing so now . . . because its just been an unneccesary stress factor that I really shouldn't try to provoke over and over again, knowing that I have an issue with it . . . and I would be able to appreciate the work other people make here too much better as well then. It deserves more praise than I'm giving it, but I'm trying to avoid other people's entires because they make me feel bad about myself, stupid as it sounds. Obviously I don't want to do that x'3
post #126143 ::
2020.08.28 4:17pm :: edit 2020.08.28 4:21pm Spring liēkd this
I believe that good communication can solve interpersonal relationships. No one has ever the right to expose others in bad light, regardless of what the other person may have done.
We can all judge by ourselves the attitudes of kleeder and Spring have had toward themselves, for over a year; and it is good etiquette to keep those opinions personal: Everyone deserves the right of doubt towards their intentions, and it conveys wrong to attribute negative qualities to other people acts publicly.
Both kleeder and Spring have feelings, people who look after them, and a long path with battles sought through their lifes, a place where they feel supported by, around people whose spirits is to be friendly, approachable, and supportive toward others' improvements can add to their lifes. One could perfectly feel here is that place; and could sometimes need to sense it's support in their lifes, and go look for memories of. No one has the right to go out of their way and attribute their own negative views of other people in their sanctuaries. The best way to solve anything, is through good, and direct communication.
Let's keep our memories bright, our place comfy, and our friends with our support.
Hey Spring. I'm sorry to hear the community's basis is having that kind of effect on you. But it brings me some level of concern as to your ability to even live in this world as it is.
The professional world is competitive even down to dumb labor, the social media internet is competitive, social connections in general are very often somewhat competitive (you gotta keep people's interest by being a better, more interesting, and/or more fun person than others).
No one has an infinite amount of time and thus the world keeps on running because most people want to make the best of the time they have. And by doing so people will naturally stick out of the bunch in some parts of themselves from others.
Now back to BotB. This community is one of casual, friendly competition. The same way that trying to be the funny guy is. It's about as realistically competitive as most of pretty much the entire lives we live. There are a lot of people who genuinely have fun being here and creating chiptunes, and thus have gotten really good at it, but still no one even seems to expect anything exceptional from anyone else but the best of us, out of principle for entertainment.
What I'm trying to get at is.. unfortunately, I'm concerned that you must be at least comfortable enough with this small level of competition to even be able to even survive in society.. and that you aren't.
I'm guessing you get very upset over any kind of what you'd consider failure, right? That failure to you is anything that isn't straight success?
I mean, should you isolate yourself from people because a lot of people fall away from you more easily than others? Should you stop trying to get a job because a lot of people are better than you thus you have to "struggle" to keep your position? (I mean this in the lightest way possible) Should you stop-
No. You're better than that. It's time to face reality and accept that life is full of strife, and failure, and that there's no point in running away from a little competition; that failure isn't the end, that failure is just another part of success, and that failure isn't even a big deal to begin with. From there you can learn that competition doesn't have to be serious, and all about success vs failure, that it can be fun without the numbers meaning all that much.
It's time for you to become a better person. To grow up and accept that life is just like that, and that you must learn to enjoy it as it is, or you may just never be happy about that limited time you have on this earth.
Remember it's all about the adventure, not just where you end up.
You are right, I need to try . . . . but I'm also afraid of ending in the same trap and throwing embarassing hissy fits yet again . . . but thank you :3
my old school of thought is so obsessive, and like you say it has been a problem my whole life, because I was just never the best or the brightest at anything. And I've become so desperate to disprove those who always said I was not good enough (which is not really anyone here btw, it's earlier) that I've just started to assume that I'm never good enough as is.
Of course, what I do with music and the like really doesn't mean shit for people who think I suck, they will keep doing it no matter what I do, and its very frustrating sure, but I need to listen to the people who actually appreciate me instead of continuing to pander to something old and stodgy which was relevant some 15 years ago . . .
Anyway, thanks for your message :3 Despite being afraid of repeating the same trap, I will try again sometime ;w;