Level 22 Mixist

2nd Σ5.592

4th Σ5.430

3rd Σ5.119

1st Σ6.119

business in pants 
1st Σ5.696

Your call is very important to us
  1st/43   Σ27.955   May 18th 2020 9:49pm
I work in retail. Just did some napkin math which gives a conservative estimate that I will spend ~287 days of my life waiting on hold in the normal course of my chosen career.

Be sure to keep listening until the end. You might miss when they pick up. In the meantime, enjoy some soothing formulaic music.
Creative Commons License

previous entry
A-zu-ra - Courage

nextious entry
cce - Stakeholders Discovering New Synergies
Level 26 Mixist
post #121150 :: 2020.05.18 11:47pm
  mk7, Jakerson, gusg21 and Vav liēkd this
this is way too accurate and absolutely brilliant. loved the initial setup of the scenario, and listening all the way through is a tremendously frustrating experience as i'm sure you intended it to be.
Level 21 Playa
post #121154 :: 2020.05.19 1:01am
  Jakerson, gusg21 and Vav liēkd this
this is amazing!

did you add the slight fuzz/distortion that i'm hearing, or is that a result of the low bitrate necessary to submit such a long entry? either way, that aspect makes it incredibly realistic (why does hold music's quality always sound so shitty, anyway??)
Level 22 Mixist
post #121155 :: 2020.05.19 1:08am
  mirageofher, tennisers, sc, TrippleP, blunderspublik, mk7, Jakerson, gusg21, V5A, xterm, kleeder and petet liēkd this
Narrowed my EQ down to only cover 300 Hz - 3 kHz, which is roughly the range of most phone earpieces. Bitcrushed it a little and voila, sorta-kinda phone-y. After applying those 2 effects, it kind of didn't matter what bitrate I chose. Sounded pretty much the same all the way down to 32 kbps. Hardest part was getting my wife to agree to voice act for me. Her cameo is saying the word "two".
Level 11 Chipist
post #121163 :: 2020.05.19 5:18am
  blunderspublik, mk7, Jakerson, Vav and gusg21 liēkd this
I thought the soulless fruits of the Corporate battle weren't supposed to instill emotion in the listener . . . so why am I feeling despair and frustration?

10/10 brilliant entry!
Level 11 Mixist
post #121167 :: 2020.05.19 5:50am
  Post-retro, xterm, Jakerson and Vav liēkd this
i've never actually been on hold, but i can imagine the fun and excitement that's conveyed through the cheery piano and wonderful melody!
Level 27 Chipist
post #121189 :: 2020.05.19 12:01pm
  Vav liēkd this
In other words, you nailed it
Level 17 Chipist
post #121259 :: 2020.05.20 5:31pm
  Jakerson and Vav liēkd this
Yo we were on the same wavelength with this haha
Level 25 Chipist
post #121333 :: 2020.05.21 7:20pm
  sc, TrippleP, Post-retro and Vav liēkd this
Definitely worth listening to all 18 minutes, the experience wouldn't be the same without doing so.
Level 30 Chipist
post #121383 :: 2020.05.23 7:41am
  boscutti939, TrippleP, Post-retro, Tobikomi, Chip Champion, Jakerson, maJsty14, Vav, amelia and blunderspublik liēkd this
cool entry. is there an extended version?
Level 11 Mixist
post #121386 :: 2020.05.23 9:24am
  Vav hæitd this
I made it to 5:24
Level 22 Mixist
post #121403 :: 2020.05.23 3:46pm
  sc and maJsty14 liēkd this
Level 6 Mixist
post #121404 :: 2020.05.23 4:01pm :: edit 2020.05.23 4:03pm
  Vav liēkd this
I put down a controller and logged back in for this. Gah- this is amazing. I was like, fav @ 33 seconds. (Listening while writing) I use to work for a 1st tier down-stream affiliate of a national health-care before I" souled" my soul to Hot Topic (at least for the time being since I get to do mini live chip performances during my lunch breaks) and let me tell yah- this! This summarizes the feelings of so many callers that I received at what is now...the 8 minute marker. I love it ♡ can't wait to look/listen to the other stuff you've made so far at a later date Vav. Thank you for this.
Level 7 Mixist
post #121733 :: 2020.05.29 1:49pm
  Vav liēkd this
Level 23 Chipist
post #121735 :: 2020.05.29 2:55pm
  Vav liēkd this
i listened to this...twice :D
Level 20 Chipist
post #121860 :: 2020.05.31 3:02pm :: edit 2020.05.31 3:02pm
  sc, TrippleP and Vav liēkd this
this is so realistic and hilarious at the same time i love it lol
Level 30 Chipist
post #121862 :: 2020.05.31 3:12pm
  TrippleP liēkd this
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
pls let it win
Level 7 Criticist
post #121901 :: 2020.06.01 11:23am
  Modus Ponens, Sloopygoop, Galgox, Grumskiz and Vav liēkd this
there are
Level 26 Mixist
post #122358 :: 2020.06.08 5:30pm
  argarak, charlotte, Sloopygoop, TrippleP, kleeder and Vav liēkd this
The only thing that would make this more realistic/worse would be if the music stopped and started again in a loop offbeat. This is hilarious.
Level 22 Mixist
post #122360 :: 2020.06.08 9:18pm
  aji and Sloopygoop liēkd this
true realism/cruelty would also require me to hard-pan everything to one ear, but alas i was too kind
Level 13 Criticist
post #122414 :: 2020.06.10 2:40pm
  Vav liēkd this
Wow, this is perfect. Kind of catchy too, just like it so often is... +1 for blistering piccolo solo.
Level 30 Chipist
post #122565 :: 2020.06.14 1:09pm
  CastleNes, mk7, Jakerson and Vav liēkd this
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
im glad it won
Level 15 Playa
post #122654 :: 2020.06.15 7:51am
  Vav liēkd this
Unfortunately this song is my life right now :|
Fortunately this song makes it fucking hilarious
Level 9 Criticist
post #123435 :: 2020.07.11 9:18am
  Vav liēkd this
I'm on hold with UPS right now. I want you to know I legit got flashbacks to this entry right now.
Level 13 Mixist
post #123488 :: 2020.07.12 7:05am
  Vav liēkd this
I have legit listened to this on loop a few times. It's great to listen to while I'm working
Level 26 Mixist
post #123853 :: 2020.07.22 4:22pm
  Vav liēkd this
there are two callers ahead of me
Level 22 XHBist
post #125997 :: 2020.08.26 1:43am
  Vav liēkd this
Hey, seems your real job IRL is to make corporate music? It sounds to real ahah!
Congratz for the win!
Level 15 XHBist
post #130289 :: 2020.11.09 11:56am
  Vav liēkd this
this frustrates me so much XD

great job!!!

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