Level 20 Criticist
Commodore 64

Commpare and Dispair 
68th Σ3.664

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Adorbs Odor 
74th Σ3.295

Tramiel Commando 
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POKE in Pants 
74th Σ2.990

Major C Word
  71st/75   Σ17.538   Dec 4th 2016 8:30am
Another aimless mess with no melody and a juvenile title.
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Level 23 Chipist
th4 D34D
post #74604 :: 2016.12.04 9:48am
  sleeparrow, malmen, MiDoRi, ViLXDRYAD and Post-retro liēkd this
Well I understand what you mean by aimless, it sounds like you were experimenting and doing something akin to what analog musicians would call jamming. I think that's both an excellent way to learn the ins and outs of a system, to better prep you for future compositions, and also can result in some of the most unique, out-of-the-box compositions that will land in your repertory. And this piece is far from being a "mess" with "no melody." Your track flows between unorthodox time sigs from 10/4 of the first beat, 13/4 and then into a nice traditional 6/4 phrase, and finally that 7/4 section before the outro. The song has multiple distinctive melodies, all in key (your leads as well), and your leads take on a somewhat vocal quality.

Though you are American, there are many elements that remind me of the drum/vocal combo of the Lunsi performers, with the more pitched musical quality of the Dagbon drum providing the central melodies and the vocalist providing the lead. For example, in this performance of Nag Biegu, you can hear that the vocalist's vibrato sounds very much like your chiptune vibrato; In this performance of Makala, though completely improvisational and directionless, this simply choir of Central African vocalists create melodies and counter melodies that evoke similar characteristics of your track; and finally in this traditional Abekor drum circle, you will hear similarities in meter and melody.

Much in the same way, I could compare the shifting meter and melodies to much of the music of China, such as in this clip where you hear a traditional Jingju performance that is inherently cinematic as there is a very visual performance that equals the importance of the music.

And I even see elements of our native country, such as this rendition of the Navajo dance song "Yeibichai" in which the lead vocal lines utilize similar expressionistic measure and melodic quality; and in this rendition of "Gadasjot", an Iroquois Warrior's Stomp Dance, and this rendition of "Shizhané'é", a Navajo Circle Dance, where the vocal melody, meter and even quality of the vocalists of Shizhane'e.

And would you call any of those an "aimless mess with no melody?" Even the many improvised offerings have great worth and value to the people of their society, as well as world music lovers. Your piece here may not have been as meticulously constructed as a well thought out traditional orchestration, but just because the track fails to adhere to the traditional mainstream, widely accepted aesthetics of Western Music, it doesn't mean the track is worth any less than those that do.

Anyway, great job! I'm sure you will end up making some very impressive pieces when do make something that you consider more serious, because this experimentation is already right on track. I like many of the elements you have, and you have implemented some decent effects such as the filtering on your bass. I'm not gonna sit here and say your track blew me away or anything, but I enjoyed it and I definitely look forward to seeing what you do as your experience grows.
Level 20 Criticist
post #74633 :: 2016.12.05 1:15am
  sleeparrow, ViLXDRYAD and th4 D34D liēkd this
Thanks for the kind words, that really made me feel better.
I wasn't being that serious with the song description.
I think it turned out OK considering it was my first time using Deflemask and my first time (intentionally) writing in a scale.

I'm surprised by the similarities to African/Chinese/Navajo music.
Maybe because it was written in a very stream of consciousness semi-improvised manner. Sometimes I write alot of unrelated parts and then try to tie them together later (like in this song).
Level 10 Mixist
post #74804 :: 2016.12.07 8:19pm
  sleeparrow and Post-retro liēkd this
almost completely lost in the melody/timing at the end, but great stuff. I like the technicality of it. :)

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