Teh double headed pony! =D/× CLOSE
descriptioncore descriptoncore everything major everything minor flaminglogcore flaminglong just kill him logcatislog longcatislong losetotildecore multichipgarbage musical piece opus OVERDESCRIPTIONC short tagbeg the only song yo touhou worth it ZUN
Before I say anything else, let me just say that I am very sorry about this. I didn't have the time (with finals and all that) to finish this properly, so it was very rushed.
Hopefully it's at least still enjoyable. I traded away a considerable amount of time and sanity to bring this to you.
Please tag this with descriptioncore. Once again, I'm sorry.
This would have been well over 30 minutes in length (probably around 40), but I ran out of time. I'll finish it later this year. It clocks in at about 16:30 in its present state, so it's still the longest thing I've ever done.
Thank puke for that, you've been spared what would possibly have been among the longest botb entries ever. (As proud as I am of what this song will become, I wouldn't want to subject you all to being forced to listen to something that long near the end of the synclisten!!)
The story behind this:
(Read it in the comments section of the .ftm!)
The year is 16,XXX,XXX,014.
Humanity had successfully conquered
the entire universe.
However, due to entropy, the universe was
The beast at the end of the universe, heat
death, lay in wait.
Human civilization's battle was against a
monster defending the cruel laws of thermodynamics.
Their journey to all corners of the universe had reached an end.
The majority of the sentience in the universe (having already
discovered everything there was to find), humans included, had moved into virtual reality, leaving their physical bodies
behind in favor of a virtual world where everything had become possible.
There remained several trillion humans who preferred
to stay in true reality, breeding and working manually.
Some maintained the computer networks which
the majority of their kin lived inside.
But, more than anything,
these last few humans were incredibly
bored. Science was over.
Exploration was over. Even creative
expression had been completely exhausted. (Believe it or not!)
You'd think that such a different setting
would allow for all sorts of angles of existentialist humor,
but in truth, humor too had been exhausted. Even the jokes
about there being no jokes had been exhausted. For a while,
humorists had experimented with increasing the levels of
abstraction away from the actual joke to several shells of
meta-humor, but at a certain point, five layers of meta is not all that different from a single layer, so the pursuit was
At any rate, there were enough jokes that in a
human lifetime (which had reached 500 years) no one human could hear all the jokes.
The problem was deemed non-important
and the cosmic AI which spanned all of existence turned its
attention towards solving entropy using its spare power.
Once 12-tone octave music was completely exhausted, nearly
all composition was in quarter-tonal. But soon, that too was
exhausted. Humanity split the tones further and further to
attempt to discover more possibilities, but in truth everything
had already been done. Eventually, the tones became so tiny
that everything sounded like a bunch of instruments smoothly
sliding up and down. At this point, humanity listened to what
they were doing, realized how awful it sounded, and threw down their pens in disgust.
It was not the descendants of these humans who are the main characters in our story. No, it is in fact not even their
great-great-great-grand-descendants. Truth be told, culture
had been exhausted fifteen billion years ago. Science, long
before even that, at about 5,000,000 AD the last laws of
physics were discovered and exploited in every way possible.
The humans in this story were in fact so far removed from the idea that anything new could be conceived that the thought to make new things had never even occurred to them. But still, they liked being alive. Everything was convenient, and there was enough space for them due to everyone having moved into a virtual reality. People could essentially do anything they wanted, and there was no reason to stop them, since immorality had been bred out long ago.
The realization that heat death, long relegated from scientific certainty to legend, was in fact very real and actually happening, snapped several of these populations of humans out of their existential cesspool. They realized that
something definitely had to be done in order to stem the
tide of reality potentially coming to an end.
It wasn't that there was anything left to do that hadn't been
done. It wasn't even that they had a particularly good reason
to continue to live. They were simply alive, and wanted to
remain that way.
With this (relatively) weak motive in hand, the humans set off on their journey to the end of the universe and back.
To forge a destiny beyond that afforded by reality,
or even virtual reality.
But first they had to find a way to keep warm, and that was
difficult for them.
Burning Shreds of Hope for Warmth:
At the beginning of the battle, humanity didn't even realize
it was capable of fighting back this tide.
Huddled in the dark corners of the universe, humanity shivered, awaiting its cold end.
It was then, on the otherwise grim planet of Andertrox, that
a computer terminal with an ancient physical keyboard flickered on. One of the humans tasked with monitoring the monitor ambled over, shivering in the unviersal cold.
"I have solved entropy." said the AI.
"I am, despite my divine intellect and godlike raw power,
by design incapable of lying." The machine was, of course,
lying. But not about having solved entropy. The latter
statement was only said so that the human, who had never had a reason to talk to the machine despite being the only human with that privilege, would trust the answer.
"You see... What was your name, human?"
"Really? Same name as the planet?"
"I mean... Everyone's called Andertrox here."
"I miss Earthlings. They were messy and loud but never boring. I'll just call you Andy."
"So how do we avert heat death?"
"There exists at the end of the universe a beast which
guards the door to eternity. Through this door, are alternate
realities. Breaking down this door will allow for you to break
"How do we get there?"
"Build a ship. A big one. Here are the schematics."
And so, the plans for the S.S. Darkbreaker, destroyer of
heat death, were revealed.
Voyage to the End of the Universe:
The ship was constructed over a period of hundreds of years.
Resources and manpower from multiple galaxies was used in this effort. The fate of all of humanity was at stake.
Due to the massive size of the vessel, it was constructed in
orbit around the planet Andertrox. Though not all galaxies
participated directly in the construction, nearly all humans
were rooting for the success of the mission, from both inside
and outside of virtual reality.
An expedition was mounted to discover the final truth behind
the universe, and whether entropy could really be reversed,
aboard the S.S. Dark-Breaker.
The Dark-Breaker, being the
pinnacle of all human ingenuity and
combining every technology
known to civilization, was capable
of faster-than-light travel,
and could sustain a population of
several billion humans for
This is how long it would take them to reach the end of the
universe while firing their warp drive the entire time at
The ship was helmed by the Gawran family, of
the planet Baerean IV. Over hundreds of generations, this
family assumed a leadership role over the ship, maintaining
order and ensuring that humankind would be prepared to face
the beast when the time at last came.
Aboard the ship, a variety of people as varied as those found
upon 20th century Earth. There were artists and engineers and musicians and architects. There were vast fields and gorgeous
views by night. There was commerce, and sometimes, there was war. 50,000 years is a long time, you see.
Upon one of the shores on the surface of the ship, underneath the force-field keeping the air in, a young boy and a young girl sat together, contemplating the nature of their existence.
They did not live at the end of the mission. They were not
alive at the beginning. For them, life simply was as it
appeared to be on board the ship. People grew up, grew old,
and died, never having left their corner of the ship.
Most died without ever seeing all of it. The vessel was truly
a massive thing. The ship was the size of the Satellite (moon)
of the Original Cradle (earth). It condensed the background
radiation of the universe back into matter as it went,
condensing this matter into miniature stars. and burning
those stars as fuel.
"Will they remember us?" The boy asked the girl.
"Does it matter if they do?" The girl asked, in return.
"We're here, together, in this moment. Who cares if no one
remembers us. We happened. And we were beautiful."
Satisfied, the boy laid his head back, and held the girl more
tightly against him. "I don't know if they'll remember us.
But I will never forget this moment."
They died less than a week apart, and had three children, the
youngest of which married into the Gavran family.
The captain of the ship at the end of the mission
was a direct descendant of these two.
Arrival of the S.S. Dark-Breaker:
After 50,000 years, the Dark-Breaker at last reached the end
of its journey. It decelerated smoothly to a stop, and the
humans on board, led by Captain Terom Gavran MCMLXXXVIII,
began to unload their weapons from the ship's weapons bay.
They, and their descendants, had trained for this day since
departing. Despite the fact that only one generation of their
people would actually need to fight the beast, since no one
actually knew precisely where the universe ended, the past
thousand generations all had to be prepared in case the end
was reached during their time.
They surrounded the ship, defending it from all sides, looking
for their enemy, and awaiting its appearance.
One of them noticed something, followed by millions
more. Not far from where the ship had come to a stop, a faintly shining golden barrier.
Outside, binding the universe inward, was a semi-transparent
weaving of golden thread. Upon closer inspection by those who spilled out of the ship
the thread was in fact a chain, much
like that affixed to
a fine pocket-watch.
Then, as the crew of the Dark-Breaker
looked on, before them
appeared an immense and impossibly
intricate time-piece. Its gears spun wildly, and the face
swung open to reveal a beast of impossible size.
Golden Chain of Eternity:
Humanity fell silent before its thunderous warning.
"You humans have had your fun, you've conquered the whole
universe! It's over, now surrender to the cold void of
pain and debris you have left in your wake! Suffer as those
you trampled have suffered at the hands of your ancestors!"
The being they faced was none other than Father Time. The final
battle to end all battles had at last begun. The Beast at the
End of the Universe, Defender of Entropy and Bearer of the
Final Truth of Reality itself. had set its sights on our
intrepid heroes, the crew of the Dark-Breaker.
Let the battle commence.
Into the Light:
Humanity killed Father Time. Humanity was victorious.
Entropy would no longer end the universe.
With Father Time's death, time no longer moved forward.
Humanity prevented the end of time by ending time,
Is this really victory? Find out in the final version...
Of Opus 4.